4th Retrieval

I go in for my retrieval tomorrow. It's my 4th and final IVF...the next anything, if there is anything, is donor eggs. My friend Ling is taking me which I really didn't want to have to go with her because she is not the emotionally healthiest person but I was hard up and it's the only one of my friends who doesn't work and that I'm tight enough to ask. You see what a bitch I am...yes, I am. Love Ling..but I have to guard myself around her as she tends to be one of those people that subtly puts you down.. Anyhow, she's taking me and I am grateful. I'm driving in as she doesn't really drive in NYC and she's supposed to drive back with me guiding her but if I'm well enough I'll drive. Kay couldn't do it as the thought of driving to NYC was too much for her..she's petrified which I don't really understand but whatever..I appreciate having people to ask when you can't ask your family.

Speaking of family I went to see my father tonight..he was horrible and was just yelling and couldn't be calmed down. The lady taking care of him tonight called me twice after I got home as he still wouldn't calm down. So stressful. I feel bad for him but he becomes abusive and then you don't want to help him..craziness.

Had more craziness at work when a friend of someone I was best friends with in high school came in and began acting all crazy. I had to end it and ask someone else to take over explaining that this was inappropriate..she was insisting I listen to all of this crap regarding my friend and wanting me to call her...absolute nuttiness. I think sometimes people don't understand the concept of professional boundaries. Aside from this the girl that is leaving my team came in today even though it was her day off. I'm not sure I mentioned that my boss finally explained she was leaving my team and being move to another. She went completely off and I'm glad that my boss got to see that side to her as it's what I've been dealing with for several years. She was almost manic with glee today which was very bizarre...I ignored it and went home early to catch up on some ZZZ's.

So that's the 411 on my life right at this moment. I am shitting 12 bricks that this won't work and I know my odds are not good but one can hope and pray.