I was supposed to have gotten my HSG exam yesterday, that's the test where they shoot the dye through your fallopian tubes...anyhow, I had called them on Friday to make the appointment and specifically requested a female which they assured me would be the case but I've dealt with these clowns before so yesterday, before I requested the time from the boss, I called them. Yeah, they said not only did I cancel my appointment but it's scheduled with a male...they put me on hold to double check as they are utterly confused and the manager comes on..."Is there a problem with your appointment"..Ummm, yeah they told me I cancelled and that I was scheduled with a male. "No, it's not cancelled but you're scheduled with a male"...I go over the whole thing how I'd requested a female she tries to put it on me saying perhaps I didn't explain good enough...a female...the thing with a vagina between her legs..that's a female..it's who I want performing the test...No, we have doctor so and so...yeah I say, I've met that dick wad...he's an ass...and this sounds like an inside problem to me not something I need to hear about so do you have an appointment with a female for me or not? No. Thank you and good bye...fucker...but I didn't say fucker..I cried instead because it's just too frustrating this process and I've really had enough...I call the other radiology place near me explain I need a female she puts me on hold forever and says she has an availability for me. I say "with a female"? She says no, no female. I say, (and I did say this) "are you guys all fucking retarded or are you just trained to act fucking stupid"...I hang up and make a note to never go there...I finally find a place about an hour from me and the next state over who has a female..I take the appointment for 12 though I know I have an appointment for "D" this morning at 10 and hope that I can hustle and make it on time.
I had asked my sibling to go with me to "D"'s appointment and one of them agreed to go. Of course when I say, you want to pick me up at work as it's right near there they say, No, I'll find it...so this morning I'm hustling trying to do my hair as I wasn't going to work I get a call from the sib...where is this place...I explain and think shit they'll be there too early as they'd already gotten to the town next door an hour ahead. I get to "D"'s program and lo and behold, no sib...we wait another 15 minutes and finally they arrive...awesome. We get through it, I go to the place for radiology, who by the way are super nice and make me start to think that it's just us New Yorkers who suck ass, and get home, crash on the couch. When I started writing this post, I was finalizing my decision not to go to OA and last minute I threw on the sneakers and went. I didn't want to go because I didn't want to answer all the questions from the Canadians...it's just that I'm exhausted by the experience already and it's draining. But I went and of course Sara, who is very pushy had very strong opinions about everything and really, who needs someone else's opinions. Sara had a very bad experience raising her only son and has tremendous guilt as she feels she did a shitty job and to be truthful, from what she says, she did do a shitty job. Apparently she was a wild woman when she was younger with too many boyfriends and she allowed one of them to beat the shit out of her son...left him black and blue and she let it happen and didn't step in so now her son has resentments. I adore Sara and she is very sweet and supportive and to be frank I can't picture living how she's described as she is a Hasidic Jew now though one of the other Canadians explained that this wasn't always the case. Anyhow, I spent too long talking with her outside and it was fine but really I need to make my decisions on my own. She thinks I'm making a mistake wanting a child though one of the other girls Shannon, agrees with me as she also has personal regrets never having had a child of her own. These girls are in their 60's by the way and all of them practice some form of the Jewish religion though Sara is by far the most religious and strictest. Nice girls. Anyhow, I went, I saw, and I didn't conquer but I'm glad I went though I didn't take back my responsibility of carrying the shit back and forth. I don't know where I'll be emotionally from week to week and didn't want to commit so...Okay, enough of me babbling.
No comments:
Post a Comment