Monday, January 28, 2013

Food and Friends

My friend Jo-ann from work asked me to take her kid home after work as she had something going on in court (personal). I agreed. Her kid is an absolute doll...one of the sweetest children I've met in a long time.. I get to my apartment and soon after Jo-ann is done and she comes to pick the kid up...her voice is weird and she explains she has a cold but can't take anything just in case. Just in case what? She says, "you know". Shit. I think she is already but if she is she won't admit to it. Jeez.

Later I find myself unable to stop eating. Is it related? Maybe. Maybe a little. But the truth is I haven't been watching my food intake or rather I've been out of control with my food intake. I can't seem to stop myself and I'm not sure what to do. Each day I resolve not to stuff my face. Even as I'm stuffing my face I'm trying not to stuff my face...I stuff my face. It's not good. I feel terrible carrying around all this extra weight. I don't feel good about myself as a person but more importantly as a woman. It just seems hopeless. My therapist is not knowledgeable about any type of eating disorders..which I'm sorry is a little weird. She asked me what OA was...come on man, really and when I bring up the food she tells me to try low carb diet such and such..man it's not the diet..they all work if you can stick to it. It's the stick to it part..that's my problem here.

Anyhow, enough of my lip.

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