Mother

So I'm writing this real quick to get it off my chest and move on and though it may sound petty, it's irritating me. I have to take "D" to see their doctor, which is fine. D and I have a great relationship and I enjoy the time we spend together however upon discussing it this past weekend my mother immediately wants to make plans around my trip scheduling her own appointments so that I can take her. I told her no...I felt guilty of course and as usual, called her later in the week and told her to schedule the appointment. So today, D calls to ask me what time they should bathe and what they need to do (you have to say to D..wash your face with soap, wash your privates with soap..put on clean clothes..and so on). I tell D, ask mom if she has scheduled her appt for the same time. D puts mother on the phone where she explains she went already as they didn't have a time that coincided with D's appt. So I say, okay well would you mind watching Tess while I take D to the appt as Tess has been alone all day. She tells me but her plan was to go along for the ride. Now..this might not be a big deal to anyone but I had this same conversation with her last time. I need her to watch the dog when I am with D because my dog spends all day by herself Monday through Friday and it really isn't fair to her. I get angry that she doesn't give a shit that we sacrifice for her child but she can't think beyond her own wants..now dont' think it would stop with a ride to the doctor just because she wants to go along, she will inevitably ask you to stop at the supermarket, pharmacy, or whatever else she has on her agenda. What makes me angriest is that not once have I been able to take D to an appointment without feeling some sort of guilt that I'm neglecting my mother in some way...not once. It can't just be that D and I enjoy ourselves without some bullshit guilt trip that this lady will give you. Love her, but she is a pain in the asspirin. My sister says, Gem, what do you expect, if it's not about her she hasn't considered it...so she's inconsiderate and we have to put up with it? She says she's lonely all the time however she's so verbally abusive to her friends none of them want to talk to her...it was different when my father was around as for whatever reason she was more in check...I don't know. Just had to vent that out. So my plan is to take Tess, tell mother she's staying with the dog and take D. Heartless? Maybe it is...I'll be living with the guilt or anger either way for the rest of the day or week.