Hope

Right now I'm feeling shitty again...just that restless crazy feeling that makes me want to eat, smoke and just search for whatever will make me feel at ease, calm me down...

Was a rough day. A good day but rough in certain respects. Had my last IUI of the month this morning waking up at the crack of ass and just feeling crazy restless, tired, but Tess won't let me sleep, and my brain doesn't make it easy either. Today, Diana's husband was sentenced...8 months...she called me hysterical but explained she wasn't upset and could care less if he rotted in jail. She was angry as she found that he hadn't paid her car insurance for several months and had lied to her about it, and that he had also stolen from other people. She explained she felt she'd been married to a complete stranger, a sociopath of sort. There definitely is something wrong with that guy. I had a meeting at the end of the day where I didn't know any of the answers and was using every ounce of strength to stay awake. All in all, it was a good day mood wise and I felt good about the insemination...I feel hopeful but anxious...on overload if you will. My body is tired, I have a headache, I have bloating, my hands are illing me, and overall feel crotchedy. But inside I feel hopeful.