Back on the Sauce

So this past Friday I went back to the fertility clinic, had my sonogram and blood drawn and showed her my med supply (they told me to bring it with)..come to find out I'm missing one which she explains I'll have to go to the pharmacy to pick up. The med is Lupron...a new one for me and the instructions go like this...I should be getting my period on Saturday...start the lupron on Sunday and then add the menopur and follistim on Monday..the nurse will explain how to do all of this..if things are different..we'll call you and let you know later today with the blood test results. I get a call as expected except she tells me I'm taking all my meds at once starting Sunday..continue for 4 days and come in on Friday..I say, "I thought I was only taking lupron Sunday and starting the rest on Monday"..no, no this is how it's going..Okay, I hang up because I tend to be a know it all so I shut my pie hole. Then I think..4 days..that's 'til Wednesday..then what? No meds? I call back..she says no it's like I told you and I explain but that means no meds for Thursday and Friday..she says hmmm..that's strange...Okay then start them on Monday and I'll look at your chart..I say listen,double check as I think I'm doing Lupron on Sunday and start the rest of the shit on Monday..except of course I don't say shit..I'm nice..I say meds...Okay she says I'll check but I don't think so..she calls...yes, you're right..blah blah blah..okay awesome thanks. Shit, thank God I was paying attention. Okay, I go to East Jabib pharmacy yesterday...and I mean this shit was far..I was following my GPS system with blind faith as I had no idea where the frick I was..somewhere in the next state is all I know..sheesh...and all I'm thinking is shit man, I still don't have my period..waiting all day for the thing..all night then..can't sleep waiting for the thing..this morning..nothing..I begin cleaning my kitchen taking the stove apart doing shit I never do trying to trigger the mother...nothing! by 9:30 a.m. stove is sparkling, as are my cabinets, backsplash, counters and sink, and I know it's not coming and use the emergency number to my doctor's office...speak to a nurse..Linda.. who seems more than competent..she says hmmm...were you on birth control? Yes. You stopped it when? Wednesday..yes, you should of gotten your period but your levels should have been controlled any way so go ahead and inject...you sure? yes, I'm positive. Okay, so I decide let's make a pot of coffee to give her some time to call back and change her mind but she doesn't call back so I gave myself the lupron...still no period. Oh well. We'll see what happens. Trying to stay Zen for all this. Have continued the acupuncture...gonna dye my hair today, vaccuum, and then to my mom's for Easter dinner. This month I think is different then the others. I don't feel hopeful but I don't feel defeated..I feel like I am going through the motions with a tinge of anxiety running through my veins. Anxiety initially triggered by "D" who by the way was seen my the psychiatrist yesterday. My sibling took "D". The psychiatrist was livid when she heard that we needed a note saying "D" is not a danger to self or others in order to participate in one of the programs in the community and according to my sibling, almost blew a gasket at find out they suspended D from the work program due to hallucinations...according to my sibling the psychiatrist slammed her thighs and let me tell you this is one of the sweetest doctors..I can't even picture her doing it..mumbled about incompetent staff, refused to do a psych eval (thank you duh!),and said, do you know how many people I know from that agency? We happen to know she's on the board of directors...I felt better knowing someone understood my position..she's calling them! Yikes..gives me anxiety as I hate problems but there it is..Hope this chick never retires but alas I know it's only a matter of time. God help us.